Welcome to a fresh week!
I traveled back to Georgia (again) for Thanksgiving. I so enjoyed seeing my two sons and my Dad. We celebrated at my sister’s with her husband and three sons and my brother even came into town too.
Here is the clan! Lots of laughter, games, delicious food (even if they weren’t all fans of my kale salad!)
Are You Afraid You’ll Disappoint Me?
“I don’t want to disappoint you!”
I hear this quite often from clients. They come to a call feeling like a fraud. At first I hear it in their voice…a defensiveness or a long sigh, or a little girl/boy voice that goes straight into justifying.
They didn’t do as much toward that project as they said they were going to do. Or, they made other choices because life called them in another direction.
Sometimes they want to run and hide and they’ll say that they almost canceled our call because they were afraid to be a disappointment.
But they don’t. They come to our coaching call in all their vulnerability and imperfection.
They soon let their guard down because they remember. This is a safe place.
And mostly they remember their own innate creative power.
You see it’s not about being perfect. Getting the gold star or A+! (although that certainly feels good!)
It’s about being willing to be real and honest…with yourself.
My clients who make the biggest strides? They are the ones who make mistakes, disappoint, make a mess, changed their mind…and own up to it.
They took action, made choices, even when it was messy and scary.
Owning up to your humanness. That’s where the point of real power is.
From this vulnerable, tender, honest, authentic place (that can sting and feel really crappy) is where the real healing, course correction, shifting of beliefs and owning of your true creative power happens.
When you dare to show up and say…here’s where I’m at. It’s not pretty or perfect. But it’s real.
Right there…is the place from where you can make real change and own your creative power.
Last week, I had 3 clients in a row, who said they didn’t want to disappoint me. What they were really saying is that they didn’t want to feel like a disappointment.
They each have a dream and they didn’t make big strides like each of them was intending.
After acknowledging that vulnerable imposter feeling, we went into the real stuff that was happening…other opportunities showed up (which means they made a new decision – hooray!), an impending surgery was worrying one client (once we acknowledged the angst – everything shifted), and for another client, a deep fear of being an imposter had her in its grip (which was mirroring itself in our relationship).
In each situation, the path to moving forward, was through the messy bits.
With each client we went into the healing, coaching, truth telling that needed to happen for them to truly move forward.
We can create action plans, marketing strategies, and new passion projects all day long. But, if you aren’t willing to go into the shadows of what’s holding you back, keeping you stuck or having you play smaller than you are destined to play.
And, those plans, ideas and projects will stay in the land of “that’s a great idea….one day it’ll happen”.
I applaud my clients for finding their courage, being brave and vulnerable…even when they don’t wanna!
This is the reality of the messy process of creating a successful business, writing that book, launching that podcast, and attracting Best Clients Ever.
The shadows are going to get in the way of the best plans and powerful dreams.
When you own it. It’s the path to more personal creative power.
It’s when you try to hide it, in favor of perfection or protecting that vulnerability, then you’re likely to live with constant disappointment.
It’s such a twist from putting on your bullet proof vest and pushing your way forward not ever letting anyone see you sweat.
Here are some questions to get you looking underneath your fear of disappointment or vulnerability:
What are you most afraid someone will find out about you?
Where are you getting stuck and afraid to admit it?
Where do you need help but feel like you “should” know better? (this happens a lot with other coaches! You’ve studied it, so therefore, you should have this aced!)
Who can you open up to so you can truly move into a deeper expression of your voice, creative power and leadership?
Are you ready to step into your Soul Work?
Let’s set up a time to talk about how you can get your Soul Work out into the world in a bigger way that feels natural, authentic and even fun! Together we’ll access your deeper voice, leadership and creativity…while shifting those blocks that are getting in the way of you growing your beautifully successful business.
